God has been teaching me so much these last few months. They are things that I have always known but really started affecting my life.
Ever since I was younger I had always dreamed of having a family. This last year and a half has had many events that that didn’t match my dream when I was younger. To begin, this past April Josh and I found out some information that again didn't match my dream or our plans. This was hard to begin with until we realized that God had a different plan. We both had talked about adoption in the past and realized it would be in our family at some point but we both thought that it was going to be later in the family. God taught me that his way is the right way and that He knows what he is doing. So we started on the path to find a country that we would adopt from. We prayed, researched and talked a lot. We didn’t know the kind of Journey we were about to embark on.
The verse that walked me through this whole initial part of our beginning was Colossians 1:11.
God started teaching me patience and relying on him for strength, which I have always known but I have now seen this in a different way. These last 5 months I have been through so many emotions, happiness, disappointment, anxiousness and frustration like I have never experienced before. I have never experienced such a rollercoaster. Through this God has been teaching me patience that is true. I always thought I was a patient person until this experience. Waiting, waiting and more waiting in this process needs daily reminders to help me be patient in all areas of my life. Colossians 1:11 spoke to me to really slow down, depend on God for my strength to not give up and to be patient.
Another area that God has been teaching me is learning to find the blessings in each day. I was reminded that blessings are poured on me every day and I need to slow down, take the time and find them. They shouldn’t be hard to find but sometimes through everything else it takes so much effort. God has reminded me consistently that it is important to find them and acknowledge them and even to say it out loud. I have learned that sometimes blessings come in different forms and I don’t realize that they are a blessing in my life. A song by Laura Story talks about this. The chorus speaks exactly to this idea that many things from God may not come in the form we think it should. It says:
'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
God has been teaching me so much but one last thing I would like to take the time to share and I really still don’t understand is listening to him and realizing that he talks to us in so many different ways. Recently with our adoption I have been feeling quite frustrated and anxious. I originally thought that feelings were me just being selfish and self-centered but someone that means a lot to me in my life helped me realize that my feelings were okay and that maybe through this rough time God was saying something to me. I may not completely understand it but I do know that slowing down and pray about it will help me learn to see if God is saying something through these situations. I often make excuses as to why I can’t slow down but after this last month God has taught me that it is so important to slow down and listen. His speaking might be through the happiest times or through the most frustrating times but if I don’t take the time then I won’t know what he is saying.
All these areas are interwoven for me because of what Josh and I have started. The process of adoption requires all 3 of these areas and even though it isn’t easy He is teaching me to start intentionally praying about these areas and to slow down and listen. I want to leave you with this verse and some words from a song that have impacted my life a lot this last year and a half and that I will forever hold on to.
2 Peter 3:9.
It’s called Lift me Up by The Afters.
Waiting for the sunrise
Waiting for the day
Waiting for a sign that I’m where you want me to be.
You know my heart is heavy
And the hurt is deep
But when I feel like giving up
You’re reminding me
That we all fall down sometimes
When I hit the ground.
You lift me up when I am weak
Your arms wrap around me
Your love catches me so I’m letting go.
You lift me up when I can’t see
Your hearts all that I need
Your love carries me so I’m letting go.
Thanks for reading and somewhere in there I hope somehow it resonates with you in an area of your life!
Be blessed and encouraged!
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