... when my husband and I decided we were ready to start a family! It was a very exciting time as I had always wanted to be a mom! We tried to get pregnant for about 4 months and when nothing was happening I decided to start doing some of the helpful tips that are given in many books, websites etc. ( for example, taking your temperature etc). We continued to try for another 7 months and when finally nothing was happening we went to see a doctor. We went through some tests and got some results. I am not going to share details but in general we found out our chances of having a biological child were very small. I was ready for adoption from this moment on but there were other factors and I needed to be patient. During Easter, I was on a trip called Calbreak (a youth ministry trip) and when I came home my husband was ready to start our new journey of parenthood. Adoption is now our story to becoming a family of 3...
May 2011- We began by researching lots of countries and contacting many agencies across Canada. We found out through the first few weeks that we didn't meet many countries requirements because we were so young. Our 3 options of countries at the time were Ethiopia, which at the time wasn't accepting new applicants because it was about a 3 year wait, USA, which is an open adoption program and at the time we weren't quite ready for that and South Africa, which is where we felt God leading us towards in the end.
June 2011- This is the month we emailed our agency to apply for the program. As well, we also contacted our province to see what paper work needed to be done and to learn where we needed to start to get the process going.
July 2011- Waiting, waiting and more waiting along with paperwork (which was just the beginning we learned:))! We filled out our provincial paperwork but needed to wait to hear back from our agency. This was the first time that we learned a new meaning of patience. When you have no control it's hard to feel relaxed. This month God was beginning to teach us something bigger than we ever expected.
September 2011- It only took the province about 3-4 weeks to review our application and approve us! We were so excited that we celebrated! We went out for supper and decided from this point forward that anything in this process that moved us 1 step closer to meeting our child we were celebrating! We were now ready to move on with our home study. We contacted our social worker and we were able to set up our first meeting with her in November.
It seemed like a long two months to wait but I think God was preparing us for what was to come. He gave us a few months of down time to really begin learning about having a family through adoption and some down time to really learn that we needed to grieve the loss of what we learned from our doctor many months ago. God knew that it would be important for us to have those months to lean on him before we even knew what we were about to embark on; an amazing yet difficult journey that He had planned for us (even though some days I still don't understand)right from the beginning.
November 2011- We had our first home study meeting and was given the paperwork to get started on...30 pages for each of us!! It was lots of thinking, writing, discussing and yet so important and valuable in the end. We had some great conversations with our social worker throughout the meetings we had in November and into December. We started getting our paperwork, reference letters, police checks, finger prints, medical checks, family portfolio etc. together to compile our dossier which was our next task to complete to helping us move closer to become a family of 3!
December 2011- We had another home study meeting with lots of reading and learning to do. This was just the beginning of all the reading and learning we were and still are going to do!
This was also our first year of having expectations in place for christmas and it was the first year of learning how to deal with unmet expectations.
January 2012- HAPPY NEW YEAR! It was a new year with new expectations and lots more to learn about adoption. We met again with our social worker and this was the busiest month of appointments and gathering outside paperwork. This included medicals, vulnerable sector clearances through finger prints, child abuse record checks and the list seemed to go on. We finally completed everything, our home study was sent to us to proofread and compile all of our documents. It was exciting to see the light at the end of the paperwork tunnel :).
February 2012- February 21, 2012 we got word that our home study and dossier had been compiled and sent off to Saskatchewan government for approval. This contained all of the paperwork, home study and our personal portfolio. Now it was waiting to see if we were approved and our file would be forwarded to Mission of Tears.
March 2012- We heard from Mission of Tears and they received our file which means we were approved!!!!!! We celebrated!
We also heard that a Canada and South Africa were getting ready to sign the ratification agreement soon! We still were not sure when but we knew that it was coming close. We were getting ready to celebrate again :). We continued to wait with hope and anticipation that this news would help get the ball rolling again.
April 2012- The first few weeks I checked my email daily to wait to see an update from Mission of Tears. Finally a day at the end of April we received the exciting news that the countries had signed the agreement. Referrals were getting ready to begin and provincial governments were ready. It was a very exciting month!
May-June 2012- Referrals were sent to Canada and were ready to move once the CIC opens. We are waiting to see if that is the case. We received the update in the middle of June and it was not what we were hoping for. The extended their review and it just smashed our hopes. It's hard to have the roller coaster feel of emotions and trusting in God is a daily reminder that I have to remind myself many times throughout the day. God has control but giving up that control is a constant reminder.
June 2012-February 2013- It has been many months of waiting. Provincial governments had closed so processing referrals were stopped in the summer of 2012 and everyone has been waiting since. Lots of emotions with good times and rough times. Not much movement in the program or the CIC throughout these months.
March 2013- By the time this month rolled around I was so frustrated, angry, stressed and tired that Josh and I went on a holiday at the end of March into April to get away from thinking about life. It was so refreshing to have time with my husband, away from life and time to relax and fill up with positive thinking again. When we got back we received an update that had no official answers but positive steps which kept my spirits up!
April 2013- I had a few weeks of great thinking and positive feelings but I definitely crashed. I am trying on a daily basis to find hope and to find trust in God. It is so hard and my feeling good days are far and few between but I do somehow know that amongst it all God has a plan even if it is hard. My faith has been challenged so much the last 3 years and I still have no idea what God is doing but I have to continue to lean on him.
May 2013- This is the month that we got our first piece of good news in a very long time! The program was starting to move forward in making progress towards opening! Nothing was official yet but we were still just as excited!
June 11, 2013- ITS OFFICIAL!! The country opened and the announcement was sent to us AND posted on the CIC website! ITS OFFICIAL! A family was travelling and it totally changed the way we felt about waiting. Its now time to wait with anticipation that our family is going to be together soon enough!
July 3, 2013- We received another update that gave us more specifics about what is happening as we speak in the program! I have started researching all the equipment pieces (strollers, playpens, car seats etc.) we will need once baby papaya comes home! It's exciting to feel that this could be the year that we are going to be parents!!
July-August, 2013- We received updates telling us that there has been quite the progress in the program! Many referrals have been given out and we were told the next set of referrals would happen in September.
August 29, 2013- I will never forget this day! This is the day we received the call that we had a son!I would love to tell you how our day looked.
8:45- I was recieving a call from my husband who never calls me. Usually just text messages throughout the day. So in my head I immediately thought it was something really good or something really bad. I pulled over to the side of the highway and answered the call.
Josh- Where are you?
Me- On my way to work, why?
Josh- You should turn around.
Me- (starting to shake)
Josh- We just got a referral, we have a son!
Me- (shaking, crying, in shock). I will just call the school and tell them I am not able to come in today.
Josh- I will meet you at home.
(This was a shortened version:)
** I tried texting but I was shaking too much so I couldn't type a single thing. I called instead :)**
9:20- I meet Josh at our house and we look at our son for the first time together and he is so precious and perfect!
10:30-12:30-We called family and friends and then we went out to celebrate for lunch and went shopping and bought an outfit that we know will actually work for the first time ever!
It was an amazing and overwhelming day but wouldn't trade it for the world!
WE HAVE A SON!!!!
We look forward to sharing more once he becomes legally ours! Can't wait until the day!
January 2014- We had one awesome Christmas this year! What a different holiday when you have your own baby! Solomon did so amazingly well with all that was new to him and we are so blessed with such a supportive family as well! I can not express the happiness that Josh and I had during the Christmas season this year! What an amazing feeling of having our own baby to spoil and watch getting spoiled! This month has been full of relaxation, getting into a rhythm with our new life and just learning more and more about our son! I look forward to sharing more updates as we grow as a family and learn more about one another in our new roles!
January 2014- We had one awesome Christmas this year! What a different holiday when you have your own baby! Solomon did so amazingly well with all that was new to him and we are so blessed with such a supportive family as well! I can not express the happiness that Josh and I had during the Christmas season this year! What an amazing feeling of having our own baby to spoil and watch getting spoiled! This month has been full of relaxation, getting into a rhythm with our new life and just learning more and more about our son! I look forward to sharing more updates as we grow as a family and learn more about one another in our new roles!
Psalm 34:8- "Taste and see that the Lord is good! How blessed is the one who takes shelter in him!"
~Continue to check back! Updates will continue!~
“I know God won't give me anything I can't handle. I just wish he didn't trust me so much.”
I am thinking that God sees something in me that I don't because I don't know how much more I can handle.
Psalm 56:8 - "You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book."
Psalm 139:16-17 - "You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God."
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